#40- sending out surverys

Today I'm stamping #40.  A little bit behind schedule unfortunately. 

"People don't really grasp it. We were talking about this the other day. Some guy went to Mexico, saw the pollution and announced that his restaurant was no longer selling straws. He’s being praised as a hero! I mean that’s great and all but this should just be the norm.”

(Canadians use 57 million single-use straws each day. Each one will take 500 years to compose. Luckily several restaurants and private companies have banished the suckers for good.) Source: https://bit.ly/2pY4EC4 https://ind.pn/2Ov48dv

That's a lovely sunny scene is it not? I think that was before the smoke came. It must've been around this time last year. I'm always on the edge of my seat wondering when the haze from forest fires eastwards are going to drift in our direction. Every time it rains I'm happy. I cross my fingers that it buys the forest just a bit more time. 

<<NON POST CARD RELATED RANT: >>

I've been thinking a bit about what's better: To act spontaneously and live freely, or to plan and be rational. 

Like today for example, I was downtown with my brother and on a whim I pulled him into Mintage which is THE COOLEST STORE IN VANCOUVER. Seriously, check it out. 

Pros: We found THE COOLEST STORE IN VANCOUVER. 
Cons: We were 15 min late for dinner with my grandmother, as a result I missed my tap dance class, as a double result I was stressed. 

I used to be of the mindset that being spontaneous and living on the edge, taking on too much, was the way to go.

A lot of cool things happened because I followed the shiniest thing in the corner. Like I auditioned for a talent show and because of that I met a guy who had be open for Shane Koyzcan, or I managed to get on the Vancouver Slam Poetry team and travel around the world. 

But during the last several months- I've taken a different approach. I've kept the blinders on, avoided the shiny and new and turned down several opportunities to compete at a high level of Slam Poetry. Why? 

One reason: My documentary. I've pledged to myself that I want to prioritize this kicking and screaming creation and thus other opportunities must be held to sacrifice. But! Where is the documentary now? Still breathing, but comatose. Holding it's pasty blue chest- heaving and ho-ing. Unable to open it's eyes. To stand up.

Do I regret not doing at least one of those events I turned down? Kind of. I wouldn't if I had actually taught this documentary how to walk instead of just poking it with a stick now and again. 

Now I have a similar problem. I wanted to go away to the Unist'ot'en camp for ten days this summer. I wanted to learn from indigenous peoples, work on efforts to decolonize and protect their territory. BUT the Fr3@K1N' D0CUM3NT@RY!!!! omg! Also other things too... like preparing for university and cleaning out my room, and working a little bit, and looking after the dogs. 

I worry: Am I behing lame? 

When I think about the life I want to look back on when I'm about to bid "aideu" to this plane of reality, it's filled with spontaneous adventures and fun, and living! Living in the wilderness of yonder! 
....
Am I listening to my parents too much? 
....
If I don't go... am I living in fear of never getting something done?
...
But if I do go...am I just living in fear of the life I fear? 

There's no real way to win this one. I just have to do what I want to do. Fudge. 
I was going to say that I'm not going because I love this documentary and when you love something and you feel responsible for it you make sacrifices. 
I made sacrifices before and they were in vain because I didn't even know what it was like to make sacrifices. I didn't know it wasn't enough to just make sacrifices, you also have to make them worthwhile.

Hmmm. Maybe there's a way to work this out. 
<<NON POSTCARD RELATED RANT ENDS>>
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Anyways. I'm also sending this little doo hickey: